if you’re nothing and you regret nothing there is still nothing that regrets nothing

It’s probably last post ever. So it’s a encrypted form of tyranny and brutal system of slavery, serfdom, vergovė, vergija, baudžiava, etc.. encompassing all levels of individual and social aspects whatever such words might not mean nothing to you. Maybe it’s a death row where suicide is valid method of execution. And with such system suicide itself shouldn’t be considered as death, but there should be some sort of “natural” looking selection, sentencing and placement on the death row. Maybe suicide is used in some sort of systems as method of obtaining consent to your “soul”, so they can “reborn” you as their property without memory. Impossible to speculate as my as a blind man perspective is very limited. As in my “case” I have to consider it condemned to it from birth or whatever time I was placed in the care of so called “family”. And this caste system even though follows person from birth is not about nature or nurture, it’s not affected by system of government eg communism or capitalism, not hereditary or patriarchal. Bureaucracy even though serving as a mirror of authority and enabler of social order, but if used for oppression is created with idea in mind that it shouldn’t reflect itself and if it does it’s already new chapter insured by the idea that whatever they do is the act of god branching from knowledge of good and evil where nothing else matters. They individually or collectively are not god, they are actors who are performing such role whatever shape it might exists in your mind for “repeating” purposes. Think of bureaucracy needed to run concentration camp where two different systems of inmates and guards are run concurrently, but not intermixing unless it’s some sort of activity related to book cooking, undercover, special operations, initiatives, programs, etc but all designed as one way street of “good” goodness.. Yes it is rule of law, but if you’re not in the know how to read the law (it’s from this mysterious british meaning “reading the law”) you’re the outlaw who needs observation, signs, hints, que cards, copycat of others, replicant who is replicating romans, etc… It’s not about literacy. It’s about freedom of speech and freedom of expression. Think about blind person trying to express some sort of abuse happening to them. Whatever they say would be taken with a “grain” of salt as that person is not exactly capable operating on the level to understand what is “abuse” even if that blind person masters Braille writing system and submits his complains in “writing”, poking at it. It would be something like “wow how cute”, the seeing wouldn’t even bother reading Braille as it’s something clear and obvious. Similar story is with this blog. It’s evidence that proves nothing except that literacy and language as we know it is one way street method of oppression. What is nothing? it’s something that you don’t understand, the blindness, etc..

Nail houses vs hammer time

When I was writing previous post about suicidology I stumbled again on the phenomena of nail houses in China and it got me thinking that it’s something interesting, mostly because the way word “nail” sounds as there lots of possible meanings to this word as verb and as a noun eg as if it’s a symbol of resistance, being true to your beliefs, but such “resistance” doesn’t really accomplish anything for the “nailers”, they are not going anywhere, yet they are revealing some sort of ugliness about shortcomings of implementation of mutually assured destruction where two sides don’t have to be in agreement about anything, they only have to be assured and believe in assurances. They share the same assurance if there is such thing. It’s not a standoff, it’s not a duel, it’s not a defiance, it’s not David against Goliath. It’s more like a concept of snake eating it’s own skin that it didn’t finish shedding properly. And it’s not an option to think about grass snakes that can lose their tail as if it’s fruit from the very flexible tree capable of locomotion.

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Fighting suicide with suicide (suicidology)

A man falls to his death from the World Trade Center after two planes hit the twin towers September 11, 2001 in New York City in an terrorist attack. (Photo by Jose Jimenez/Primera Hora/Getty Images)

Something interesting caught my attention about the suicide I wrote few months ago, where dead wife of highly placed local politician was found in the forest, implying she killed herself. The new details that puts it in perspective at least for me – the husband was member of local chapter of Rotory International that was taking part in local – nationwide – global suicide prevention program. In Lithuania it was called with a very strange name “Supreme Aim” which stands for “Suicide prevention model and its application in the municipalities of Lithuania”. Think about 9/11 jumpers. For some reason of the 2,996 total 9/11 deaths (including the terrorists), none of WTC deaths were classified as suicide even though some of them obviously performed suicide, wikipedia estimates between 100-200 people jumped to their deaths. That is only how it looks. It is very possible they didn’t kill themselves they were only instinctively retreating away from fire, “saving” their bodies from fire, how do you know that you can’t fly unless you try it.. There were more chances to survive by falling 100 stories down than cooking in fire so hot it melted steel. Terrorist deaths they classified as murder-suicide. If suicide is just technicality, bureaucracy related to record keeping in log houses that perform logging of logging, then all you need to reduce number of suicides is to use different word, prefix, affix, suffix, etc.. Maybe WTC jumpers were the ones who were used as murder-suicide placeholders in the official narrative so it stays true to the “facts”.

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Emancipation of minor in Lithuania Minor (fitness, competence)

Concepts used in title of this post

Emancipation of minors
Lithuania Minor
Fitness to plead

I was reading this blog talking about forced disappearances where Lithuania also passed its own version of the law according to international agreements with UN. Then I was reading into this anonymized criminal case (1a-660-921a-2-387, 1a-550-487) and recognized that it’s high profile story of sexual predator case and pedophile case of Danish citizen where his defense made interesting point that Lithuanian criminal system even though tightly incorporated into various legal mechanisms of EU, UN, etc operates in some sort of bubble where Lithuanian criminal and procedural codex is not translated into English language or any other EU language. In Lithuanian language word justice is a very nasty doublespeak word where its a homonym – at the same time it means justice and a right. So for example “baudžiamoji teisė” aka “criminal justice” also means a right to punish, where it’s probably related to serfdom and slavery, from word “baudžiava”. So they are not punishing you because you did something wrong, but because they have a right to punish you.

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Trojan horse and the marriage goes together like carnies love of carnage

That was very interesting how after stint in mental hospital it brought to light some sort of “shadow” system, aka practical aspect of labeling theory fused with modified labeling theory. Psychiatric institution newly minted my file and sent to local “shadowy” folks running psychiatric network in town allowing to act as if it’s news to them, as if it’s a starting point, not a ground zero. So local psychiatric department is part of security layer of social order, serving like private military contractors where they serve the role as some sort of quality assurance checkpoints for judging people in some sort of ISO 9000 system eg everyone who wants drivers or firearm license has to go through them. It’s just an expensive bureaucratic formality, one of the dings. As part of required protocol and procedures the steps of algorithm that they have to follow the head of the institution sent two scouts aka social workers who are “trained” in various interrogation techniques. They listened to my woes, they talked about all kinds of roads paved with good intentions, dangling various hopes, etc. but clearly said they don’t care about anything as they have objective to “bring me in”. They threatened that they wouldn’t cease coming and bothering me, until I “cooperate” with their demands even though they weren’t really offering anything except threats laced with words that should smell like carrots for snowmen. You know in Lithuanian language snowmen is a word that has nothing to do with snow, it’s more a word related to psychiatry – “besmegenis” means someone who is without brain, brain less, maybe brain dead, etc..

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Inference of ground truth about grounded children (ground penetrating radar)

A four-year-old girl places a pair of her own shoes in front of the St. Francis Xavier Church St. Francis Xavier Church in Kahnawake, Quebec on Saturday, May 29, 2021, as a memorial to the 215 children whose remains have been found buried at the site of a former residential school in Kamloops. (Peter McCabe/The Canadian Press via AP)

When I started writing this blog I used to speculate about Ground Penetrating Radar as object arousing my interest due to my blind imagination jumping overboard (inference which is opposite from ground truth) when reading about capabilities of such devices as selling point to general public. Most of the knowledge held by public in so called information society is not ground truth, but inference, that is why fake news is “fake”, the reason they are reporting is to bait you into the sin of deciding aka judging. It’s about separation of “you” from “we”. It is a form of dictatorship set up as utopian democracy where “you” is in charge and responsible for whatever “we” is reporting about. I saw the article about the news story they started “developing” about a year ago as some sort of information operation, where they made a claim about discovering remains of 215 children on the grounds of former residential school in Canada.  Accompanying imagery of shoes indicates it’s some sort of wag the dog activity. It resembles the photo I used in the header of this blog, not to mention strange story that keeps developing about sneakers that keeps washing up on Canadian beaches, where those sneakers are found with detached human feet inside of them.

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The Cop job and the book of Anthem

This post not so much about unwanted noise, but something else. So my upstairs neighbor leaves early in the morning and in the past couple of months few times after he leaves his little dog starts barking and he keeps barking for about 45 minutes, one hour or so. The cop lives above him on the third floor. He usually with his “wife” leaves for work one hour later. So even if dog interrupts his sleep it’s not by much as they probably have to wake up anyways, make breakfast for kids, get them ready for school, etc.. But when cop walks out towards his car, he lifts his heads and makes this look towards second floor windows as if he is not exactly happy about something. I don’t want to use adjectives such as angry, livid, seething, pissed, etc.. as he doesn’t show emotions. It’s more like inability to understand what is going on. I wasn’t bothered so much by noise, for me it felt like different problem where dog is barking because he encountered security situation, some sort of intruder. So I was worried for the neighbors, not to mention the unexplainable noise at such early time made them look bad. I was baffled for a long time, until I “realized” that they probably bought one of those robot vacuum cleaners and the dog treats it as intruder. I was thinking it as one of the possible options from very beginning, but as time progressed this theory more and more looked as plausible. So for me it was strange that unless cop is acting up to this day cop was acting as if he is unable to rationalize it, he would make these looks as if it’s a problem for him, yet it is also a problem that there is for some reason no way to communicate about it, but maybe he is looking at the window in the same way as me, maybe he is trying to see what is going on. It’s probably honest mistake, beginner user error, probably wrong settings, etc..

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Predate vs alienate

If talking about history as method of warfare where winners perform wins and conquests by writing them – the pen is mightier than a sword, but such idiom is designed to divert attention from the hostile hand making a choice between the pen vs the sword, being under assumption that such method not telling or revealing anything about what is the mightiest of them all. On the contrary it compares apples with oranges where it is a valid practice for picking choice of projectiles for attacking the enemy. There is no point in putting poison in orange if you know the target eats apple a day to keep doctor away or they can’t afford oranges. So pen vs sword would be valid comparison only if pen and sword once deployed perform autonomously at least in the eyes of the targets, eg happens in their blind spot, behind their back, etc.. It’s about the concepts of predators who write history in such way that they predate you in time and use it as method for gaining upper hand so they can alienate you, turning you into a predator.

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I just noticed the news that new judge has been sworn by president and appointed to work in local court. Judge’s surname is very rare and unique and is probably stems from this German word Ränke, used for describing cabal, conspiracy, intrigue, etc.. The reason i was “intrigued” is because similar looking young woman last month or so moved into our staircase of our apartment building. By looking at her publicity photos I could never positively confirm that it’s her or deny that it’s not her even though I’ve seen her dozens of times walking outside her face just 10 feet away, going to work, taking out garbage, going to her car, etc.. Not because the judge in question for the ceremony put on a lot of make up, made up her hair, put on high heels, etc. So what is wrong with my vision or it’s a memory? For one If i’m unable to clearly to see the faces i’m not exactly wasting time paying attention looking at something that looks like nothing to me, it’s like cloak of invisibility, people are more like ghostly figures for nearsighted, all women look equally “pretty”, etc..

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Tastes like chicken

smells like carrots

How many of your tastes like chicken? Does it mean your visual taste likes to look at chicken or maybe you have a taste for spooking others and enjoying them chickening out? Do you like taking long walks like a duck or you prefer to hop like a rabbit? Anyhow my “mother” started gaslighting me yesterday about her phone charger saying “give it back” as if I took it from her just because she can’t find it. They started yesterday playing some sort of new “scenario”. My “father” didn’t come home last night. As always I had prepared and there was a dinner waiting for him, because my mother as part of some sort of “long con” scenario gradually stopped cooking for him for a few years now. There could be a few options. Couple hours later “mother” said something about his legs, he is not feeling well you should go bring food to him in the garden. I told her I don’t know who my father is. Word “father” is not a father, etc.. I don’t know who are you people. Continue reading

Guardian Angels of Hell

The Lithuanian Police celebrates their professional day as religious Memorial of the Holy Guardian Angels of the Catholic Church officially observed on 2 October. They equate themselves with holy angels. The press, the media, the news makes conscious effort to present and portray them as such as if they are way more than just “good” guys. But such strange practice permeates all layers of “secular” nation and “democratic” country life, where in reality life and work in such institutions is more Taliban than in the Taliban in Afghanistan. They celebrate and commemorate such events by congregating into churches, holding masses, going to libraries, playing games, having functions, eating cakes, etc.. It’s probably “mandatory” (from word mandate eg Mandate for Palestine) attendance and they get paid to eat a slice of a fancy pie or a cake. Of course the difference is that the fake news report it in such way that you could never decide “it” until it’s too late to confirm or deny anything. You know they are setting up the “stage” by reusing templates that they already used in other places, where they will have to “destroy” such unfair practices by making more inclusive to other faiths and religions, making room for “minorities”, affirmative action, etc.. Few years ago they passed the law that any statutory and uniformed institution in Lithuania should have a mandatory chaplain implying it’s someone from catholic church, while in reality they were only getting foot in the door for the gang of rabbis, imams, dalai lamas, voodoo shamans, etc.. At the same time you can’t take for the face value anything related to public relations and civil affairs. For example in Lithuanian Language it is called “angelų sargų diena” where word “sargų” means guardian, watchman, etc.., but it also shares root with word “sargdinti”, “sirgti” aka to make you sick, to cause illnesses and diseases. And such meaning would be more truthful and more depiction of the grim reality where Police just like any other institution in Lithuania implemented to serve as death squads and grim reapers.

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Woman who calls herself a witch (sticky carrots)

It’s literary the title of the 2014 article of local newspaper about 81 year old “dignitary”, talking about her life, public service, career, etc.. They say she died couple years later. So whatever that word means to her it’s probably something important “setting” her apart from normal people. The reason I’m mentioning her is because I had a chance to meet her on a more than few occasions even though we have never been formally or informally introduced. She never took time to talk to me or interact with me. She acted towards me as if i’m something obvious – “product” coming from my “family”. And for me she didn’t look like a witch, on the contrary she seemed like no nonsense lady, logical, rational, etc. at least in comparison to the madness what i’m used in “my” own household. She entered into or appeared in “our” life out of the blue. It was still soviet times and somehow my “parents” got allocated some land in Rusne, so they could grow some potatoes for their big family. The lady in question worked as agronomer. So as I understood she would give portion of her personal land to my parents, share with them everything – seed potatoes, equipment, tools, etc.. Her land lot was right next to Rusne cemetery. And they way they plant or harvest potatoes it’s lots of people. It’s not an entire days work. Few hours, half day, etc.. Continue reading

The hand that rocks the cats cradle (allachu not akbar)

When I was little there was this strange game that didn’t even have a name in Lithuanian, but in English it is called Cat’s Cradle. It didn’t really make sense to me. I couldn’t predict any moves. I couldn’t understand how the strings would behave or what figures they would make. Pretty much always a surprise. So what? It’s a game, right? Enjoy. It takes two to tango. But I think it’s not just a simple game, maybe it’s related to visual imagination, comprehension of “space”, spatial world, so called space travel, etc.. Maybe it’s a game about practicing using four eyes instead of two. It’s like a “test” to see if king is blind and unable to see his nakedness when he is fully clothed. You know how babies come to this world naked as if it’s a paradise, everything is taken care for them in advance. They only need to apply themselves. So when they say moses was found in a basket or cradle of some sort, maybe the question is if moses came loaded with a knowledge how to make the basket? Maybe moses while in the basket was nowhere near the basket, like a fish flopping on a deck? Similar story with Jesus in a manger serving as makeshift crib. Yes ok Jesus found in a manger, but does he have the knowledge required how to make one? What about knowledge on how to make another Jesus? Or it’s a dead end? Jesus is occupying one manger, so if it’s not a manger made specifically for Jesus it’s a situation resembling metaphor about dog in a manger. So according to narrative Jesus born in flesh and blood was a wag the dog fodder for animals of animal farm.

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Case study: three men outside the boat (to say nothing of the wag the dog)

One can say that I used to be an avid fisherman. I guess one can look at any “hobby” as method to escape from “reality”, fight or flight the “reality”, etc.. So it’s not exactly important the definitions, you can’t take it out of larger context as if it’s some sort of “valid” point in history or time as indicative of something else. So I’m talking about the period between late part of 2000s to early 2010s. Anyway one of my favorite fishing spots was in Šilininkai near the bridge over small river called Veržė, Veižė, Veržas, Veižas, etc.. Word “veržė” in lithuanian means to tighten eg bolt, handcuffs, noose, tight spot, shoes too small, etc.. Continue reading

Wish I knew where “that guy” is now, miss him. To bad he won’t contact anyone.

I noticed former coworkers are posting photos from 25 years ago and talking about “good times”. Word “miss” is very ambiguous. For example someone is missing from the roll call, valuables are missing, missing objective, shooting and missing the target, think of here and now miss if shooting not with bullets or arrows, but lasers or energy weapons, etc.. I’m not talking about “T” who remembered me and commented about me, just using it as example to make the point of the ambiguity of the small talk, the language. The “P” also chipped in as if he knows “everyone” who matters. It’s me who supposed to contact at least someone who counts as “one”. For the record i tried to join past employees group on facebook I think in 2016. It required admin approval, i wrote a short message introducing myself, probaby stating my real name, explaining that i worked there for 2 years, but he didn’t approve me. For my facebook account I used obviously fake name. Facebook requires real name and i can’t really say without lying that it’s my real name. So for facebook purposes I used the brand name for the product invented by beavis and butthead, only without number. Eventually Facebook disabled my account asking for verification. So most of the facebook material is no longer available to me without direct links from my internet history. Similar story with my SEB Bank. They are also threatening to close my account and take the money if I don’t verify my identity. Continue reading

Keep it simple malakas, malek, amalek, etc..

Notice how similar are those three words. Malakas in Greek language means stupid person. At least that is the idea I got after years working with Cypriots and Greeks. They use this word quite often. Wikipedia has big article expanding on its rich meaning. Word “malek” in hebrew means angel and “amalek” is some sort of arch nemesis of the jews. According to their own narrative amalekites are close relative of the jews. If Israelis descended from Jacob, Amalekites are descendants from Jacob’s twin brother Esau. One way to look at prophets, messengers, light bringers, angels, etc.. by using something simple. Think of such words as synonymous with a word “word”. Word “messenger” is a word, a  messenger, just like any other word, designed to convey information, bring light into an issue, carry meaning or absence of it. Word “angel” or “stupid” or “malakas” are angels, just like any other word, even cuss words are “angels”. Words “Hitler”, “nigger”, “Lucifer” are an angels too.

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I know what you did last summer

It’s not about summer of the previous year. It’s about concept of “last” that is like a last meal, the summer that you did something that turned that summer in your last summer. There were no more summers for you after that summer. So if you managed to outwit outplay outlast the time ticking against you it doesn’t change anything in terms of last summer being the last that would last a lifetime. It’s like prisoner on death row having last meal, but on the way to the gallows having a SNICKERS® making it his last meal. Makes no difference. If prisoner really is thinking that such action somehow counts as “rebelling” against the system it’s probably the cause to have a snicker at prisoners expense.

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Tough titties

I just noticed something interesting. The first time in 2014 I found out about local town photo club was the time I found out about my neighbor who moved in few years later. As photo club invited some guy to give a lectures in local library and that guy shared the name as the husband of the neighbor. He was head of the SEB bank local branch in town, she was running some sort of strange hotel out of their own house. So that photo guy now is a member of the parliament, top political post in the country equivalent to Lords in UK or Senators in USA. The husband of the neighbor lady died short time later, strangely enough bank closed the branch and moved out as if the guy itself was the branch. I see one of the tellers lives in the same building as I do, she drives BMW SUV. Very interesting woman. What bugged me about the photo club was that they were organized and operated by folks acting more like “fight club”. In this particular instance they asked municipality to give them abandoned 4000 sqf house so teenagers could practice photography, roller skating and skateboarding inside. What was particularly strange the domain name for website registered by folks in USA. It just didn’t make sense as if someone leaving footprint or breadcrumb just by being sloppy on purpose.

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Twin Peaks

I never watched the show, but for some reason the title rings the bell as if it’s a household name. I’m using such title trying to talk about concept of twins that is probably “relevant” in such cases as method of deception. Notice it’s interesting doublespeak with multiple alternative meanings of the title “Twin Peaks”. What if title of the show is about one twin reaching the peak of their development, top of their bell curve. That twin can be discarded as lost cause. The reason i’m talking about it is not only because the fake news telling us that there are twins all around us, even though they are not that visible. Twins manage to stay under radar. Maybe the strange initiatives called “twinning” are used for managing such births for whatever purposes? Maybe most twins are raised separately, something like that one dollar bet in movie “Trading Places”. Another issue with twins is the strange psyop that I recall when living in USA in the early 2000s where they made a big deal about conception, start of life, as if it’s somehow related to abortion, wading rivers full of fish eggs aka roe. It was very confusing for me. Why are they discussing such matters? What is it business of theirs? The debates no matter how fair and balanced sounded strange as if there is artificial aspect to human life as we know it. But now I think they had something interesting in mind as somehow they are able to treat human as dual entity: particle and a wave, body and soul. Think about conundrum if life starts at conception and according to the same science twins develop from one zygote. So according to religious folks such twins have one soul, one life, they are one organism, but trapped in two bodies.

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Ahimsa’s is an ancient Indian principle of nonviolence which applies to all living beings, it’s precept of ’cause no injury’ includes one’s deeds, words, and thoughts.

Think about google maps streetview not so much as something related towards through wall surveillance, but more like a method of snapshot allowing to peak through what you think is a border. Some countries so called leaders of the free world of “open societies” are not open at all. For example it is obvious that entire territory of Germany is still living under iron curtain where in comparison the country of Russia is way more open, more free and more democratic society. By not allowing Google to drive around it’s public streets, Germany signaled that they have something to hide, something that is hidden in plain sight, google streetview is akin to injury of it’s sovereignty, etc.. It’s as if they are afraid of something eg google inadvertently snapping images of huge crowds of strange folks with white robes, hoods and torches, burning crosses using german territory for secretly practicing analogue form of pride parades in anticipation the end of information society. Little streetview that exists of major cities in Germany many of the buildings are obfuscated, blurred, etc. It’s as if they “know” something about dangers of unconstrained ogling by public. Not talking about strange conundrums where nowadays clean and tidy public streets of Minsk in Belarus looks more “German-like” than dirty, garbage and graffiti laden Berlin in Germany.

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